BLOG HISTORY
Don't put yourself in a box. You are so much more than what you think you are.
You are
who you
are
I ACCEPT ME
May 1, 2015 Friday
Hello Beautiful,
To be at peace with ourselves, we must first accept ourselves.
Accepting ourselves means that we stop striving to be something we are not. We are happy, pleased and love the person that we have become. We are not a perfect or completed person, but we are on our way to becoming that.
When we can accept that we are who we are, and that we cannot become someone else, we can be at peace with ourselves. To have peace in all other areas, we really need to be at peace with ourselves.
Striving after something we will never be will only leave us stressed, depressed and in worse shape than what we started as.
When I say that you accept yourself, I mean that you accept who you are through and through. You can always work on your weight, keep up your appearance, the normal daily things but there is no reason to go over board and obsess about something that is physically impossible for you to become.
You are beautiful. The sooner you can accept yourself, the sooner you can reach a more peaceful lifestyle.
In this month of May we are going to talk about our identity. How do you view yourself? How do others view you? Over the past few weeks, I have been given an in depth view of how wrong I have been perceiving myself. I will share many of these stories and hopefully help you to see yourself more accurately, as the beautiful, amazing and unique individual that you are.
Love,
Karissa "Beautiful" Hagemeister
FINDING KARISSA
May 3, 2015 Sunday
Hello Beautiful,
These past few weeks, I have been on a self discovery path. This journey is not one that I was planning to take. It kind of just happened.
Up to this point, I thought I knew myself really well. When I had turned 25, I had reached a place where I had discovered who I was. I knew myself better than ever before. But I think it is important to go on journeys to discover ourselves every so often. We change regularly and we adopt things as who we are, taking on false identities, sometimes without even realizing it.
One of the biggest things I found was that I had changed so much of myself because I was in love with this guy that I used to know.
On a journey of self discovery
Photo of Karissa Hagemeister
I changed so much of me, trying to be a girl that I thought he would like so that he might fall in love with me too, if he ever returned into my life. I know that sounds silly and stupid. It is. I didn't even realize I had done so much changing and in the process I lost a lot of who I am.
When we change for someone, we end up losing in the process. We lose a part or multiple parts of who we are. If they end up accepting us, they end up with part of a lie. Both parties end up disappointed and hurt in the end.
I've always been a quiet, secretive, keep-to-myself type of person. But I realize that is not the best option when you are trying to have a relationship or friendship with someone. I end up holding back so much of myself, that they never quite know who I am. They give me so much of themselves that I start thinking that I need to change to be more like them.
This is just the beginning of the journey I am taking to find myself again. It feels good to get me back. It feels good not having to play roles that I thought I needed to play.
If you have done a lot of changing for someone, maybe you should take a journey to find yourself again. Think about your actions and see if that is something that, the deep down you, would do.
Sometimes we get a little lost. But we can always find ourselves again, beautiful.
Love,
Karissa "Beautiful" Hagemeister
I lost
a part
of me
WHAT THEY SAY
May 5, 2015 Tuesday
Hello Beautiful,
Happy Cinco de Mayo!! I hope you were able to enjoy some delicious, Mexican cuisine, maybe a fiesta and a siesta as well. I had some homemade steak quesadillas for dinner that were to die for.
So anyways, let us talk about what “they” say. Whether we like it or not, what “they” say tends to be what we do, adopt and believe to be true. I fall for it too many times myself.
When I say, “they,” I am referring to the celebrities, artists and so-called idols of the time. What these individuals say holds a big sway over what we believe and accept as truth, as well as what our children or grandchildren, nieces and nephews and the like believe.
It doesn't matter what they say ...
Photo of Karissa Hagemeister
I believe that the group that has the biggest impact over us are the songwriters and singers. Music today “teaches” us how we should act in relationships. How we should act in break ups. What we should do or say in certain situations. These songs set us up for heartbreak, failure and a hallow inside.
The number one thing we can try to remember is to be true to ourselves. The life you are living is your own. No one else has lived it before you. You have to follow what you believe to be true and make your own wise decisions. Don’t base everything you do off from what “they” say.
If we feed our minds with Taylor Swift songs, about all the players and all the haters, it is easy to adopt an attitude like her’s when it comes to relationships. We can begin to believe that all the males are players and are just using us and we are going to end up heartbroken anyways. So we begin to walk around thinking we are just going to play, play, play because thats all that people do anyways, right?! No.
I fell for that one recently. It ended up being a big disaster. So rule number two, be careful what you are feeding your mind with. What you think, you become. Even if it is not the truth and it is not really you.
There is so much more I could say on this topic and I may do a part two for the next blog, but for today, don’t listen to what “they” say, beautiful.
Love,
Karissa "Beautiful" Hagemeister
Be true
to
you
DO WHAT THEY DO
May 7, 2015 Thursday
Hello Beautiful,
I am going to continue from the latest blog post, because I feel like this is a very big topic. And a very big issue.
In America, we have normal, everyday people that have made their way into the spotlight. We call them celebrities. Thanks to outlets like the media, their lives get blown up for all of us to see. Somewhere in the mix of things, we believe that we need to imitate their lives, speech, dress, etc...
This is where the issue comes in and where things get dangerous. Much of the celebrities live lavish lives but they are under major pressure to perform because all eyes are always on them.
We imitate, try to fake and lose ourselves along the way
Photo of Karissa Hagemeister
Many of them start out as good people, maybe even good examples but after time, they cannot take it and so they resort to alcohol and substance abuse and a number of other things to help them cope.
We have placed these regular people on high pedestals, the only direction for them to go is down. When they fall, we fall right along with them because we imitate what they do, where they go, what they buy and what they say.
It is fine to admire their skill, talent, beauty, whatever but when we start desiring to be them or be like them, we have taken it too far. We are saying to ourselves that we are not good enough as we are, so we need to change so we can be like them.
Who we are, our identity, gets jaded because we are trying to become someone else. The thing is, you do not need to be someone else. You are wonderful just the way you are, beautiful. Never, ever forget that.
Love,
Karissa "Beautiful" Hagemeister
Be true
to
you, pt 2
Hello Beautiful,
This video clip is for all of us who have forgotten who we are. This is such an empowering clip. I encourage you to watch it and share it with all of your other friends. I do not care who you are, this is what we all need to hear.
Be encouraged and be loved, beautiful.
Love,
Karissa "Beautiful" Hagemeister
May 9, 2015 Saturday
WHO ARE YOU?
Never
Forget
Always remember who you are ...
Photo of Karissa Hagemeister
Mommy & Me, celebrating mother's day
Photo of Karissa Hagemeister and her mother
Hello Beautiful,
I hope all you mothers had a Happy Mother's Day. You have such a valuable and precious role in this life.
So far, with the topic of identity, we have discussed how we have accepted identities based off from how other people view us and how we take on identities from what we are fed through Hollywood.
Did you know that you can take on wrong identities based off from views (often negative) that you have of yourself? This one can really mess us over. As we view ourselves in a certain way, whether we are really that way or not, that view gets passed off to others and they see us that way too.
May 11, 2015 Monday
WHAT DO I SEE?
What do you see in the mirror?
I will share an example from my life. I don't know when I started believing this lie about myself, but it had to have been somewhere between middle and high school. Without realizing it, I started viewing myself as a monster. That may sound really weird. But when it came to guys, I was always too scared to show any interest in any of them because I thought they would be utterly disgusted to know that I liked them. I'm sure that was never the case but I treated myself like I had some kind of disease that made me so monstrous and hideous.
I believed and lived that way for a very long time. When I finally realized how I was viewing myself (a few years ago), I was in shock. How could I think such horrible things about myself? But we all do it. We are too hard and critical on ourselves.
We need to learn to see ourselves as the beautiful creations that we are, each uniquely and specially made.
Love,
Karissa "Beautiful" Hagemeister
KINGS & QUEENS
May 13, 2015 Wednesday
Who you
are made to be
Hello Beautiful,
I have been watching many of The Anima Series, youtube videos. They are only a few minutes long but they are powerful spoken word that has been hitting the very heart of me.
This video that I am sharing today is very relevant to the topic of identity. It is called Kings and Queens. It spoke deeply to me and I felt the need to share it with you. To remind you who and whose you are.
Love,
Karissa "Beautiful" Hagemeister
WHAT DO YOU DO?
May 15, 2015 Friday
Hello Beautiful,
So tell me about yourself: “Well, I work at such and such a place as their (insert title here).” Let’s be honest, how many of you, when asked that opening question, dive right into your work role? I am guilty.
You know what that says about us? We define ourselves by what we do. For me, I do a lot of modeling. The majority of the time, I feel like that is all I am good for. A pretty face, nice smile, good body. I forget that I can be used for intelligent, problem solving conversations. I forget that I can comfort and love, be an encouragement. So much of what I think of myself now is based off from what can be seen in front of the camera.
None of us are surface beings. Its not all about the way we look on the outside. It is not all about what we spend the majority of our day doing. The important truth for us to realize today is that we are not what we do. We are so much more. We are deep, intricate and detailed creations. Each of us so different and so unique.
Modeling last night for Wonderland Jax ... but modeling does not define me
Photo of Karissa Hagemeister
I am sure you have heard the term “workaholic.” I used to define myself that way. I would even brag about it. I did not really care to have fun, or at least I did not think I did. My life was based off from how much I could do in one day. How much I could work. Get done. Accomplish. If I took time to play or relax, I got mad at myself. There is no time for that. I spent years basing my worth not only off from what I did but how much I was able to accomplish. In the end, it all amounted to nothing.
It is important for us to see that life is not a race or a competition. Who has a better job or a better title. Who gets more accomplished, more awards. Who you are is based off from all the other little things that make you happy.
So let’s think about this, what do you do, beautiful?
Love,
Karissa "Beautiful" Hagemeister
INSTAGIVEAWAY
May 17, 2015 Sunday
Hello Beautiful,
What better way to remember who you are than a fashionable T that reminds you every time you look in the mirror?
Our clothing line, Kingdom Dezigns, has started a fashion T line and we are doing a special giveaway on Instagram, now through Wednesday. Follow us on instagram and follow the rules below to be entered in the contest.
Instagiveaway!! @kimgdomdezigns is giving away one I am Beautiful fashionable T to one lucky winner. Here is how the contest works: Step 1: like this picture on Instagram. Step 2: follow all three Instagram accounts tagged in this picture. Step 3: comment below, tagging 5 of your friends to join the contest.
Optional: Leave multiple comments with 5+ friends tagged in each, each extra comment is an extra entry.
This contest is open to USA residents. The contest will end at midnight EST on Wednesday, May 20th, 2015. The winner will be announced on May 21st. Please allow us time to verify all entries and choose a fair winner. Per Instagram rules, we must mention that this is in no way associated with, sponsored by or administered by Instagram, inc. By entering, entrants confirm that they are at least 13 years of age, release Instagram of responsibility and agree to instagram's terms of use.
InstaGiveAway
Photo of Karissa Hagemeister, her mom and her sister
MY WORTH
May 21, 2015 Thursday
Hello Beautiful,
Why do I make such a big deal about identity? What should it matter if you want to act like Taylor Swift and look like J Lo?
It is none of my business what you want to do and how you want to do it. We each have our own life to live, our own choices to make. However, I have learned some important things about identity and how they can affect the way you view yourself, your worth and the way that others view you as well.
You see, when we get our identities confused or try stealing someone else’s, we play with our own worth. We in turn, speak to our hearts and tell ourselves that we are not worth love, affection, attention, trust, etc ... as we are. We need to be someone else to be able to get that.
InstaGiveAway winner was announced today YAYYYY
Photo of Karissa Hagemeister and her sister
We have very fragile souls, very fragile hearts. No matter how strong you are or much muscle you have, your heart is made of glass. When you, even unknowingly, tell your heart that it is not good enough, you are breaking your own heart. You are setting yourself up for a bloody mess.
Believe me, beautiful. I have done this so many times to myself, without realizing the damage that I was doing. After I was in too deep, I realized the damage that I caused myself and I was a complete, total mess. So destroyed. So broken. Nothing left. It takes a long time to be cleaned up from that kind of disaster. And it is not something that we can fix ourselves.
So if you feel that in some way you are getting your identity misconstrued or trying to take on an identity that is not yours, please take a step back before you wind up in the kind of mess that I have been in more than once.
Messing with your own worth is not a smart game to play. You are beautiful. You are strong. You are brave. You are wise. And know that you are loved, beautiful.
Love,
Karissa "Beautiful" Hagemeister
SHARE YOUR STORY
May 24, 2015 Sunday
Hello Beautiful,
For practically a year and a half, I have been sharing my stories with you. I've told you about struggles with health, relationships and just life in general.
I think it is important to share your story. You never know who you impact or how many people you reach and how many lives you change when you share your story. This is part of the reason that I blog. Most of the time I don't think that anyone reads what I write but than I get messages from different people that have been impacted by something I shared.
We want to hear your story
I also love to hear people's stories. I get to experience life from another persons perspective. So something I want to do for the entire month of June is share my reader's story. We all have a story to share. If you are comfortable sharing your story and would like it posted on my blog, start sending me stories now. You can leave it anonymous or you can post a picture with it.
You can share anything from your life, maybe a lesson you learned, maybe something you just want to get off your chest or maybe it is something that you think a lot of people could benefit from. Whatever it is, tell us your story.
Send them to bringingbeautifulback@gmail.com
Love,
Karissa "Beautiful" Hagemeister
FIND YOUR WAY
May 26, 2015 Tuesday
Hello Beautiful,
When you lose your way, get confused, forget who you are, you come to the end of yourself. You hit rock bottom. Life as you knew it, or the life you thought that you knew, comes to an end.
This is often looked at as a bad thing. Bad because it is often a painful place, a very hard place, a place of struggle. But it ends well if we can stick through it.
I am at that place. I hit rock bottom. Everything that I thought I knew, thought I had a hang of, it all came falling down around me.
When your lost ...
I had made the mistake of allowing my identity to get wrapped up in these things.
Now that all of these things have fallen to pieces around me, I realize that they did not define me. They should not have had the place that I gave them in my life. Now I have to transition from viewing myself that way, to finding who I really am, outside of my jobs, my love, my future, my plans. Again.
Transitions like this seem to haunt me for days, weeks even. I like to know the future or at least have an idea of what it may involve. But right now, I do not know anything. I don’t understand what I should do right now. I do not understand where my life is heading or if it is even heading anywhere.
I am making it on the other side of my mess. I am finding myself aside from those other things. It is hard when it has become habit to view myself with all those other things and not just viewing myself as I am.
This is just part of the process when you learn to find your way back to who you are. If you are feeling lost, beautiful, don’t worry, you are just finding yourself.
Love,
Karissa "Beautiful" Hagemeister
SMASHED IDENTITY
May 28, 2015 Thursday
Hello Beautiful,
We have been discussing identity this month. A very dear lady in my life shared part of her story that has a lot to do with not only losing her identity but how she was able to find herself.
It is a very heart rending story but it is so good to hear other people's stories. To see the paths they have walked down and to be able to learn and relate from what they have went through.
I encourage you to listen to her story, maybe it will help you with yours, beautiful.
Love,
Karissa "Beautiful" Hagemeister
Keep walking it out ... you will make it.
Photo of Karissa Hagemeister